Loyalty is well plotted and the storyline is interesting. However, Thoft attempts to fit a 1000 page plot into 400 pages. This is done at the expense of character development and world building. The scenes are too short for the reader to become truly invested in them. The secondary characters are given one or two lines of description, and remain two-dimensional.
Thoft has made an attempt to create a strong female protagonist, but she comes off flat. Her characterization is very much like a generic male action hero who also likes lipstick and shoe shopping. She does not seem to have any emotional conflicts, even in moments when she should be conflicted. There is no character arc or growth.
Thoft thought up a good story but failed in the telling of it. If you are a reader only interested in plot, read this book.